Warhammer

Let's see... Sunday, 11.40pm.


A couple of days ago...
being the genius that I so clearly
am, I just HAD to check out
her "Friendster" profile.

She had uploaded a few new pics.
And... I totally freaked out.
Mann... guess I must've really fallen for her.
Sheesh.

I didn't sleep at all that night.
In the morning, I got out of the house.
All dressed up, and nowhere to go.
At 8am.
Brilliant, I know...

Just as I was about to reach home
after some aimless wandering,
someone asked me out to lunch.

I was exhausted and depressed.

So ofcourse I said "yes".
Naturally.

Weird thing is, I arrived on time!
Yep.
Me.
Arriving in Orchard Road on time.
Yet another historical moment.

The girl is the friend of a friend...
and by now, I guess you could say we're dating.

Anyway,
when I was first saw her in-person,
I was like "whoa".
Nice, straight hair;
nice face;
nice figure (I couldn't help noticing, dammit!);
and best of all...
no moustache!
I know. I checked.

She talks in a way that
some might call "cute".
I call it "slightly annoying".
The reason there's the "slightly"
there is because she's going out with me.

Well yeah.
Going out.
With a girl. From Singapore.
Incidentally, she wants to be
in a serious relationship...
that would lead to marriage.
Yep. Marriage.


Oh yeah, almost forgot.
She's into games, man!!
A gamer chick!
If that isn't hot, I don't know what is!

Technically, she wants to get married
at around 24.
And she has quite a few suitors.

For that reason,
I'm gonna keep going out with her
until she meets some other guy
and hooks up with him.

What?
She's a Singaporean!
Didn't I tell you I'd
rather DIE than end up with a
girl from Singapore?

So yeah... if things work out
the way I plan,
I'll have someone to hang out with on a regular basis
for a short while...
and when she meets up with
some other guy,
she'll get what she wants.

Either way,
we'll both be happy like chipmunks.
Yep.
Like chipmunks.

Plus, I won't be the bad guy...
because she'll be the one
who's gonna "dump" me.

It's all good.

Well, enough of that

Shut The Hell Up

2.30 am.
Can't sleep.

Got a meeting with the "director"
later today at 3.30pm.
Director of what, exactly, I don't know...

What I DO know is that
his authority ranks higher
than that of the Course Manager of Electronics
at ITE Yishun.

I just hope he isn't
as incredibly stupid as the
lecturers I spoke to about my grades.
Idiots.

I'll explain once it has been resolved.

Anyway, let's see now...
I'm 25, and yeah, I'm gonna say it again...
I've never had a girlfriend (MAN do I hate that word!).

When I start talking about
that, some people would
go "oh she'll come..."

Oh. She'll come, eh?
Ahh.. I see.
Why, I feel so much better now!
Thanks!

Now here's a pole.
A long pole.
Stick it up yours, will ya?

Gotta love it when you're
serious about something
and people laugh about it.

So please, feel free to laugh with
a pole stuck inside of you.

I never should have gone out
on that first date.
It's like a highly addictive drug.
You get a taste of it,
and well, yeah, there ya go.

"She'll come". Right.
Screw her.
If she comes, I'll just tell her to run off the edge of a cliff.

I'm lonely, you freakin' idiots.
I'm not much of a people-person, yeah...
but that doesn't mean I'm a damn celibate hermit.

Bloody hell.

"She'll come".
Well I'd hate to break
it to you, but that hardly makes me feel
like jumping for joy...
especially seeing how you're doing nothing
to help me...
and you're happily (or in the process of getting) "attached".

Just shut up.
How about that?

Seriously. It's better to do that...
than tell me this stupid-ass
line over and over again that makes me want to
kiss an electric eel: "she'll come".

I'd rather die than
end up with a girl from Singapore.
And that's the truth.

Wow. I actually feel better.

Well enough of that

Screwed Over

Well, I just got my exam results.

And well, she's right.

My GPA is only 3.355,
not including the CCA points.

Yes, that means I didn't get a single "A"
grade, and "C's" for most of the modules this term.

For the core
modules, I got "B's",
which still pisses me off,
but not so much.

As for the remaining 2 modules,
well,
could someone please explain to me
how handing in all the projects,
as well as performing
well in practical exams
earn me "C's"?

That's right.

You do everything right,
and you still get a "C".

And how would I know
how well I did
for my practical exams,
well, for "Web Development"
for example,
everyone had to do the same thing.

You had to create a web page
and make it look the way your
lecturer wants it to.

The exam ends
once the time is up,
or the lecturer checks
and verifies that
it looks the way he wants it to.

And for the 2 exams,
that's exactly what I did.

And still, I got a damn "C".

Now, at the beginning of this post,
I mentioned that she was right.

"She" refers to the course manager,
who said that my GPA will drop.
And she said that well
before the deadline for the projects
and exams.

They were pissed at me
for missing so many classes.

Now, how does
poor attendance get you a "C"?

It gets you expelled,
or detention.

But grades?

I spent all my cash on the damn course.
2 years.

By the end of it, I was
so broke,
I had to skip classes
because I didn't have enough cash
to attend them.

Yep.
One of the main reasons
why I gave classes
a miss was because I was too broke to attend them.

Wait. Why didn't I apply for financial
assistance, you ask?
Why, that's a great question!
Why didn't I?
Oh hang on... I DID.
And they didn't give it to me.

So... let's recap.
I'm too broke to attend classes.
They don't give financial assistance.
They get pissed off.
They screw me over.

So you know what?
I'll be free the next couple
of months.
I'm gonna put it to good use.
They WILL lose their jobs...
and that stupid-ass
bitch will at least get demoted.

It won't matter to me if
their families have to end up living
on welfare.

They messed with my life.
I'm gonna f*** them up.

Well enough of that